Hetta and I met while living in Peru, 420 kilometers apart and her in a huge city and me at 3650 meters in the mountains. At the time of our meeting I was starting to realize that as much as I needed to make some important decisions surrounding my lifestyle, social and community commitments as well as my relationships with my husband and family, the more I tried to see my way the more I hit closed doors and a familiar circle of confusion.
When I learned that Hetta had been and was working as a Life Skill Coach I nervously asked her if we could meet once, when I was in the city, to explore what it was all about and if I could benefit from her and what she studied.
I decided to meet with her a second time and then continued as I could. It is difficult to live in a foreign country with not only a different language but also customs, values, social relationships and a history that is not yours. To find someone who could understand my history, my culture was hard to find and Hetta filled that role, she could see the cross cultural issues as well as the personal ones.
In time she introduced me to the work of NVC (Non Violent Communications) and we used it as a platform for communicating what I needed to those to whom I saw I needed to talk to. At first I found it uncomfortable but after using some of the feedback, reading more about the process and practicing it made sense and I was inspired by it.
It was not only helpful in what I was working on but I in turn began to use it within my circle of employees, volunteers and friends. I went so far as to order the book in Spanish and have since given it to and worked with people I know who come into contact with situations that need better communication: teachers, a restaurant owner, a community volunteer, a local guide. However, I did for a time find it easier to use it within that setting as it was so rewarding for them and I felt timid using some of it with my family, as in why are you talking that way. It could be made humorous but in the end it helped to reach issues that needed to be reached.
Although Hetta is no longer here, she left me with tools to use and to share. I also know that from afar if I needed to reach out to her she would be there. It was a calmness in a stormy world when we sat and talked, I miss that.
Diana Morris, Huaraz, Peru